The books and tools below are thoughtfully selected to support the work you’ll do in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples. Whether you’re waiting for your first session or looking to deepen the progress you’ve already made, these resources can help you begin understanding the emotional patterns that shape your relationship.
Available in book, Kindle, and audio formats, they’re designed to complement—not replace—the transformation that happens in EFT. Used alongside your sessions with a trained EFT therapist, these resources can offer powerful insights, build emotional safety, and help you and your partner reconnect in more meaningful ways.
Available in book, Kindle, and audio formats, they’re designed to complement—not replace—the transformation that happens in EFT. Used alongside your sessions with a trained EFT therapist, these resources can offer powerful insights, build emotional safety, and help you and your partner reconnect in more meaningful ways.
THE DEMON DIALOGUES AND WAYS TO STOP THE CYCLE OF PAIN
‘Hold Me Tight’ by Dr. Susan Johnson is a must read for any couple embarking on the journey of reconnecting and rebuilding their primary relationship. It is my first recommended reading for any couple beginning couples therapy for several reasons. Number one, the book helps one understand the science and research behind EFT, because it is not some fly by night couples therapy approach, but has deep scientific roots. Second, Dr. Johnson lays out the dances couples become caught in found in the section entitled ‘Demon Dialogues’ which enables couples to see that they are not alone in their dances and can start to identify when they become caught so they can stop these demon dances. Third, the deeper core wounds or attachment injuries can and do occur as a result of the negative dances and she gives hope on how to help couples moving through the hurts. Using this book alone to change your relationship, especially when you have been caught in pain and disconnection for some time, can help but it is not enough. It will help to facilitate your process when combined with Emotionally Focused Therapy.
‘Hold Me Tight’ by Dr. Susan Johnson is a must read for any couple embarking on the journey of reconnecting and rebuilding their primary relationship. It is my first recommended reading for any couple beginning couples therapy for several reasons. Number one, the book helps one understand the science and research behind EFT, because it is not some fly by night couples therapy approach, but has deep scientific roots. Second, Dr. Johnson lays out the dances couples become caught in found in the section entitled ‘Demon Dialogues’ which enables couples to see that they are not alone in their dances and can start to identify when they become caught so they can stop these demon dances. Third, the deeper core wounds or attachment injuries can and do occur as a result of the negative dances and she gives hope on how to help couples moving through the hurts. Using this book alone to change your relationship, especially when you have been caught in pain and disconnection for some time, can help but it is not enough. It will help to facilitate your process when combined with Emotionally Focused Therapy.
Hold Me Tight" Workbook
Drawing on the latest developments in Emotionally Focused Therapy, a field pioneered by Dr. Johnson, The Hold Me Tight Workbook is packed with sage wisdom and science-backed advice, as well as compelling conversation prompts, exercises, activities, and resources to help couples work through conflict and achieve greater levels of intimacy.
Drawing on the latest developments in Emotionally Focused Therapy, a field pioneered by Dr. Johnson, The Hold Me Tight Workbook is packed with sage wisdom and science-backed advice, as well as compelling conversation prompts, exercises, activities, and resources to help couples work through conflict and achieve greater levels of intimacy.
A WORKBOOK BASED ON EFT METHODS TO HELP BUILD A SOLID FOUNDATION FOR CONNECTION
This hands on must read, resource helps couples begin the process of building a foundation of new ways of connecting together. While Hold Me Tight is an excellent primer for therapy, this workbook will help carry the couple throughout the therapeutic process to really integrate the experience of therapy and create more safety between sessions. Reading and doing the exercises in the book together, between sessions, helps each partner better understand themselves, their partner and their relationship, and the deep connective work they have done in the session. The reason I recommend this book so strongly is because I noticed that couples who integrate the workbook into their therapeutic process, build more safety and connection within their relationship and between sessions, progress through the therapeutic process more quickly. Oh and BTW, I have utilized the book within my own relationship and really enjoyed getting to know my husband and my patterns with him even more.
This hands on must read, resource helps couples begin the process of building a foundation of new ways of connecting together. While Hold Me Tight is an excellent primer for therapy, this workbook will help carry the couple throughout the therapeutic process to really integrate the experience of therapy and create more safety between sessions. Reading and doing the exercises in the book together, between sessions, helps each partner better understand themselves, their partner and their relationship, and the deep connective work they have done in the session. The reason I recommend this book so strongly is because I noticed that couples who integrate the workbook into their therapeutic process, build more safety and connection within their relationship and between sessions, progress through the therapeutic process more quickly. Oh and BTW, I have utilized the book within my own relationship and really enjoyed getting to know my husband and my patterns with him even more.
"CREATED FOR CONNECTION"
Are you looking to enrich a healthy relationship, revitalize a tired one, or rescue one gone awry? This book helps you do both and to incorporate the teachings of God into your marriage. We all want a lifetime of love, support, and faith. But sometimes we need a little help. Enter Dr. Sue Johnson, developer of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and “the best couple therapist in the world,” according to bestselling relationship expert Dr. John Gottman. In CREATED FOR CONNECTION, Dr. Johnson and Kenneth Sanderfer, a leading EFT practitioner in the Christian community, share Johnson’s groundbreaking and remarkably successful program for creating stronger, more secure relationships not only between partners, but between us and God. CREATED FOR CONNECTION will ensure a lifetime of love.
Are you looking to enrich a healthy relationship, revitalize a tired one, or rescue one gone awry? This book helps you do both and to incorporate the teachings of God into your marriage. We all want a lifetime of love, support, and faith. But sometimes we need a little help. Enter Dr. Sue Johnson, developer of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and “the best couple therapist in the world,” according to bestselling relationship expert Dr. John Gottman. In CREATED FOR CONNECTION, Dr. Johnson and Kenneth Sanderfer, a leading EFT practitioner in the Christian community, share Johnson’s groundbreaking and remarkably successful program for creating stronger, more secure relationships not only between partners, but between us and God. CREATED FOR CONNECTION will ensure a lifetime of love.
LOVE SENSE: THE REVOLUTIONARY NEW SCIENCE OF ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS
In Love Sense, Dr. Sue Johnson—developer of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)—translates groundbreaking research into a powerful, hopeful message: we are biologically wired for deep, lasting connection. Drawing on attachment science, she shows how romantic love is not a mystery or a myth, but an emotional bond that can be understood and strengthened. This book helps couples recognize the patterns that pull them apart, and teaches what healthy, secure connection looks and feels like.
In Love Sense, Dr. Sue Johnson—developer of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)—translates groundbreaking research into a powerful, hopeful message: we are biologically wired for deep, lasting connection. Drawing on attachment science, she shows how romantic love is not a mystery or a myth, but an emotional bond that can be understood and strengthened. This book helps couples recognize the patterns that pull them apart, and teaches what healthy, secure connection looks and feels like.
THE SEMINAL READ FOR PARTNERS WHEN AN ATTACHMENT INJURY SUCH AS INFIDELITY HAS OCCURRED
Shirley Glass helps both the person who cheated and the one who was cheated on understand one another’s experience as though they are in the shoes of the other and what has created these tragic events. This is a book many cannot put down and is usually devoured when an affair has been recognized. Please couple this process with Hold Me Tight otherwise it can be too much at one time. Caution: Creating a timeline of the infidelity, will only create more PTSD symptoms making it harder to heal. I am not suggesting that the evens be ignored, they, in fact, need to be processed with the partner in a way the partner can hear the pain not only the rage.
Shirley Glass helps both the person who cheated and the one who was cheated on understand one another’s experience as though they are in the shoes of the other and what has created these tragic events. This is a book many cannot put down and is usually devoured when an affair has been recognized. Please couple this process with Hold Me Tight otherwise it can be too much at one time. Caution: Creating a timeline of the infidelity, will only create more PTSD symptoms making it harder to heal. I am not suggesting that the evens be ignored, they, in fact, need to be processed with the partner in a way the partner can hear the pain not only the rage.
"HOW CAN I FORGIVE YOU?"
When partners are traumatized by infidelity and betrayal, ‘How Can I Forgive You’ helps the body and heart of the reader begin to explore options to healing. For example, how not to be caught up the pain that in many cases keeps the person who has been betrayed, hurting more. It is also helpful for the partner who had the affair, read or listen to, in order for them to better understand the pain their partner is experiencing. Reading out loud to one another helps provide healing and creates connection and understanding.
When partners are traumatized by infidelity and betrayal, ‘How Can I Forgive You’ helps the body and heart of the reader begin to explore options to healing. For example, how not to be caught up the pain that in many cases keeps the person who has been betrayed, hurting more. It is also helpful for the partner who had the affair, read or listen to, in order for them to better understand the pain their partner is experiencing. Reading out loud to one another helps provide healing and creates connection and understanding.
HOW TO HELP YOUR SPOUSE HEAL FROM YOUR AFFAIR
After an affair is revealed, many partners feel a deep desire to repair the relationship—but often don’t know where to start. In this straightforward and compassionate guide, infidelity specialist Linda J. MacDonald outlines the critical do’s and don’ts that determine whether trust can be rebuilt. Drawing on over two decades of experience, she offers clear, actionable insight into what it takes to truly support a hurt partner and begin the path toward healing.
After an affair is revealed, many partners feel a deep desire to repair the relationship—but often don’t know where to start. In this straightforward and compassionate guide, infidelity specialist Linda J. MacDonald outlines the critical do’s and don’ts that determine whether trust can be rebuilt. Drawing on over two decades of experience, she offers clear, actionable insight into what it takes to truly support a hurt partner and begin the path toward healing.
TRAUMA RECOVERY: WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?
Have you ever wondered “Why did I do that?” or “Why can’t I just control my behavior?” Others may judge our reactions and think, “What’s wrong with that person?” When questioning our emotions, it’s easy to place the blame on ourselves; holding ourselves and those around us to an impossible standard. It’s time we started asking a different question.
Have you ever wondered “Why did I do that?” or “Why can’t I just control my behavior?” Others may judge our reactions and think, “What’s wrong with that person?” When questioning our emotions, it’s easy to place the blame on ourselves; holding ourselves and those around us to an impossible standard. It’s time we started asking a different question.
TRAUMA RECOVERY: EMOTIONALLY FOCUSED COUPLE THERAPY WITH TRAUMA SURVIVORS
This book provides a theoretical framework and a practical model of intervention for distressed couples whose relationships are affected by the echoes of trauma. Combining attachment theory, trauma research, and emotionally focused therapeutic techniques, Susan M. Johnson guides the clinician in modifying the interactional patterns that maintain traumatic stress and fostering positive, healing relationships among survivors and their partners.
This book provides a theoretical framework and a practical model of intervention for distressed couples whose relationships are affected by the echoes of trauma. Combining attachment theory, trauma research, and emotionally focused therapeutic techniques, Susan M. Johnson guides the clinician in modifying the interactional patterns that maintain traumatic stress and fostering positive, healing relationships among survivors and their partners.
TRAUMA RECOVERY: THE BODY KEEPS THE SCORE
Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, a foremost expert of trauma, has spent more than three decades working with survivors. In the Body Keeps the Score, he uses recent scientific advances to show how trauma literally reshapes both body and brain, compromising sufferers’ capacities for pleasure, engagement, self-control and trust. The tremendous power of our relationships both to hurt and to heal. – and offers new hope for reclaiming lives.
Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, a foremost expert of trauma, has spent more than three decades working with survivors. In the Body Keeps the Score, he uses recent scientific advances to show how trauma literally reshapes both body and brain, compromising sufferers’ capacities for pleasure, engagement, self-control and trust. The tremendous power of our relationships both to hurt and to heal. – and offers new hope for reclaiming lives.
Binge Eating Disorder: The Journey to Recovery and Beyond
This amazingly informative and insightful book helps individuals and partners who struggle with the leading eating disorder in the country, binge eating disorder, understand what drives this disorder and how and who we can turn to for love and support. Please note, many of the challenges identified in this book are eerily similar to other addictions people struggle with. At the end of the day it all comes down to connection and where we lost it, and how we try to fill it with food.
This amazingly informative and insightful book helps individuals and partners who struggle with the leading eating disorder in the country, binge eating disorder, understand what drives this disorder and how and who we can turn to for love and support. Please note, many of the challenges identified in this book are eerily similar to other addictions people struggle with. At the end of the day it all comes down to connection and where we lost it, and how we try to fill it with food.